He is a serious man, but every word is laced with kindness and an absolute conviction that sexuality and concomitantly, pleasure, is the gateway to a deeper understanding of ourselves, our partners, and the world around us.
Conscious Sexuality Coach Jonti Searll made it his life’s mission to explore, discover and teach sexuality and pleasure. To him, it is about the power of transformation, about creating a better reality through the physical tools we have been given. And that begins with sexuality and pleasure.
Searll is one of the sexual wellness speakers that returns to The Sex Expo to share diverse topics and discussions this week.
He said: “The power of pleasure is so important. It can heal illness, not only in our sexuality. And so many of us have sexual issues, sexual traumas. We live in a society in a country with incredibly high levels of sexual abuse and very high levels of a lack of fulfilment and a lack of satisfaction. And this affects every area of our life. It’s connected to every area of our health. It’s connected to our nervous system. It’s connected to our heart. It’s connected to the level of stress that we have. For me, this the sexual path is also a spiritual path.”
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Searll believes that people do not get enough education about sexuality and that a lot of preconceived ideas linger in the subconscious, almost preventing sexual progression. He said: “We get very little education about sex, and we get very little education about pleasure. And what we do get is very fear based. It’s how not to get HIV or AIDS or sexually transmitted infections, how not to get pregnant or how not to get somebody else pregnant. Consequently, we don’t learn a lot about our bodies, about our partners’ bodies, about what it means to be a good lover. And that’s in the fullness of the term, not only the sexual side of it, but how to communicate, how to have good relationships, how to express ourselves, how to communicate, how to ask for what we want to grow and expand in our relationships. And I see so many relationships that struggle and flounder and end. So many people struggle with sexual issues and problems simply because we don’t have honest open forums to talk about our sexuality.”
Searll believes everything is interconnected and subscribes to the principles of Tantra. He also points out that the base chakra, one of several energy points located along the median of the body, is also the creative chakra. He said that many times simply exploring pleasure or deepening your own understanding of your sexuality can unlock new frontiers or creativity within an individual. He has witnessed this first hand, several times.
One of the topics Searll will address at The Sex Expo is the extended orgasm for women. He said that it is possible to extend the feeling of euphoria from a handful of seconds to potentially a few hours. And it’s possible for men, too, to work on and develop means of pleasure that allows for an extended orgasm. He teaches a lot of these techniques at his couple workshops and weekend getaways, too.
He said: “Our sexuality becomes a path to spiritual awakening and spiritual awareness. So, helping people have greater pleasure is not only about helping people be healthier and happier. For me, it’s also about the power of transformation of how we can be happier within ourselves, how we can be more creative, how we can be more present, how we can be more in life, how we can be better parents, better friends, and how we can change so much in our society and within ourselves.”
Better sex and more pleasure are a holistic experience. Searll said: “It starts in the heart. Then comes the head, then comes the body. You can’t really separate and distinguish any of them because they’re all a part of our sexuality. Everything is connected, everything is interacting all the time.”
The Sex Expo takes place at Time Square Casino in Pretoria between 13 and16 October.